well I wanted to braid my hair
bathe and bedeck myself so fine
so fully aforethought for your pleasure
see:
I wanted to travel and read
and runaround fantastic into war and peace:
I wanted to
surf
dive
fly
climb
conquer
and be conquered
THEN
I wanted to pickup the phone
and find you asking me if I might possibly be alone some night
(so I could answer cool
as the jewels I would wear
on bareskin for you

digmedaddy delectation:)

“WHEN
you comin ova?”

But I had to remember to write down margarine on the list
and shoepolish
and a can of sliced pineapple in casea company
and a quarta skim milk cause Teresa’s
gaining weight and don’ nobody groove on
that much girl

and next I hadta sort for darks and lights before
the laundry hit the water which I had
to kinda keep an eye on because if the big hose jumps the sink again
that Mrs. Thompson gointa come upstairs
and brain me with a mop don’ smell too
nice even though she hang it headfirst out the winda
and I had to check
on William, like to
burn hisself to death with fever
boy so thin be
callin all day “Momma! Sing to me?”
“Ma! Am I gone die?”
and me not wake enough to sit beside him longer than
to wipeaway the sweat or change the sheets/
his shirt and feed him orange
juice before I fall out of sleep and
Sweet My Jesus ain but one can
left and we not thru the afternoon

and now
you (temporarily) shownup with a thing
you says’ a poem and you
call it
“Will The Real Miss Black America Standup?”

guilty po’ mouth
about duty beauties of my
headrag
boozeup doozies about
never mind
cause love is blind

well
I can’t use it

and the very next bodacious Blackman
call me queen
because my life ain shit
because (in any case) he ain been here to share it with me

(dish for dish and do for do and
dream for dream)
I’m gone scream him out my house
because what I wanted was
to braid my hair/bathe and bedeck my
self so fully be-
cause what I wanted was
your love
not pity
because what I wanted was
your love
your love